Questioning the Soul

Lately, I’ve been taking a look at my life and asking my some soul questions.

For years, ever since my divorce, I have been on a quest of bringing my dreams to life and creating the life I love. Yet, now, here I am at 53 years of age looking back at the last 10 years (probably more), wondering: What were my dreams anyway? And, more importantly: What are my dreams today?

I believe my driving desire when this journey started was to live life my way. For me, it was exploring different paths, traveling to different places and meeting new people.

As of late, this desire has shifted.

Part of me feels like I have lost the flame that motivates me to go after new challenges and explore new paths. I feel worn out and just want to settle down in one place, get lost in books, documentaries and writing.

But upon reflection, I have 20, 30, or even more, years of living left. There  are so many things left to explore in this lifetime. So, why do I sit here, feeling like I’m stuck in the mud, not wanting to take a leap down a new way?

New questions have arisen from this question.

Am I afraid? Insecure? Too comfortable in my present situation? Does the uncertainty seem so daunting, that I just don’t have the strength to face it?

Maybe.

From past experience, I believe there is a new path waiting for me. When I am ready it will appear. And I have the tools to take on this new path even stronger, smarter and more resilient than ever before.